To My First Love

We all have that one person we’re never gonna lose feelings for. No matter how long it’s been, no matter how many people tried to replace them, they will always have a special place in your heart. Mine is my first love. Sadly, we were never together and I don’t think he ever loved me back the way I loved him.

It sounds really cheesy and the typical ‘first love’ story but I honestly want to say everything that’s been going on in my head for the past few days. I haven’t really spoken to anyone about it because I feel embarrassed that it’s been years and I still think about him. I think about what we could have been if I didn’t make such stupid mistakes. I think about what we could have been if I never left. And it hurts me…so damn much. It is what it is now and I can’t change anything. But, if you ever see this one day I just wanted you to know…

I would have taken care of you. We could have been great together and I would have given everything I could to you. Seeing you recently still amazes me how charming and sensational you are. You deserve everything. You’re smart, funny, and honestly just breathtaking. I wanted it to be you so badly and I wanted it to be us. I know you will never feel the same way and one day you’ll leave this small city and find greater things and greater people. I wish you the very best and I just wanted to thank you.

Thank you for existing and being you. I don’t know if it was the thought of being with you or the thought that you would magically say you cared about me too. But, whatever it was, it was there. My feelings never changed and I will always admire you. I hope one day I can move on and find someone to love wholeheartedly the way I loved you. I know you’ll do great things because that’s what great human beings do.

🙂